An Open Letter to and Ex-Roommate and Ex-Best Friend

I’m sure you guys remember my rant a few months ago about some issues I was having at school. I needed to get a lot off my chest or else it would have all built up and things would have gotten worse.

Anyway, a few weeks ago, I sent an email to the roommate in question apologizing for my actions senior year and also mentioning that I think we both kind of screwed up. I told her that if she didn’t respond that I would completely understand. She never wrote back. I don’t know if it was because she didn’t want to or if it was because she never got the email (I sent it to her Cornell email and I don’t know if she still uses it). Either way, maybe it will be seen if I put it on my blog. If she doesn’t see it, that’s fine. I want you guys to see it too.

“Why did you bother?” I’m sure you guys are asking. “Things seemed pretty bad and irreparable.”

Why? Because as damaged as our friendship might be, I had to try. I don’t want to look back years from now wishing that I had reached out and at least apologized. I don’t want this to be one of my big regrets in life–at least I know that I reached out and at least attempted to fix something, even if it was something that couldn’t be fixed.

So, here goes nothing.

* * * * * * * * * *

I want to start by apologizing. I’m sorry for the arguments we’ve had and I’m sorry for everything that happened between us. I know that that’s not nearly enough to repair what happened over the course of senior year and that, in all likelihood, we’ll never be as close as we were, but thinking back on the last year makes me sad. You were my best friend and we let little things get in the way of our friendship.

Fall semester started it all and that I know I was rude, didn’t communicate well, and–let’s be honest–I was a pretty crappy friend in general. I’m sorry. That was a really bad time for me. I was being thrown into the middle of drama that didn’t involve me and I was losing friends left and right. I realize now that had I just talked to you about some things, it might have (and probably would have) played out differently. I wasn’t your best friend. I wasn’t even a good friend, period.

Things spiraled out of control and we both let the most trivial of things affect our friendship as the semester went on and winter break passed. I know that I’m not completely innocent in this whole situation, something that I’ve reflected on for a while now actually. I think we were both at fault and we let the situation get out of hand. For me, at least–I don’t know about you–I let things stew under the surface instead of talking about it. I think that if we had just communicated better, we could have nipped it in the bud and much of this could have been avoided.

It might be too late for an apology and for me to send you this, but I’ve been thinking about it for a long time. I wanted to get this all off my chest and I thought that you should know how I feel, even if is three months after graduation and nearly a year after everything started.

I hope that nothing I said in this email offended you–that was absolutely not my intention. I’m just trying to get down exactly how I feel and I might not have worded certain things well.

Hell, you might not even still use Cmail, but I figured I would give it a shot since it’s probably the best method to get in touch. If you don’t respond, I’ll understand. You should know that I’ve been thinking about everything that’s happened over the past year and that I am truly, deeply sorry. I’ve thought of everything I could have done in the past year to change the outcome and I’m wishing I had made a change, done something about it. Like I said, we were the best of friends and it got away from us.

I hope that everything is going well for you.

Best,
Sam


Home Sweet Homecoming

So I know that after my last post I said I would be back for good, but things got a little crazy. I apologize!

This time, though, I AM back. You might not believe me and if you don’t, then you don’t–but I’ll prove you wrong. This post is dedicated to last weekend. The best weekend I’ve had in a while.

Because I’ve ben so MIA with writing and posting this blog, you guys probably don’t know that I graduated! That’s right, on May 25, 2014, I officially graduated from Cornell University! The amount of tears that I shed is unreal because I really do consider Ithaca to be a second home, but all good things must come to an end, right?

One of the best parts about graduating, though, is that you get to go back for HOMECOMING. One weekend in the fall where you get incredibly drunk and relive your college years (not that I haven’t occasionally done that anyway) and it is 100% acceptable to do so. Let’s just say this weekend didn’t disappoint.

Besides the copious amounts of alcohol I consumed and the ridiculous hangovers I had (I can’t drink like I used to. But I’m also not drinking 5 out of 7 days a week anymore so there’s that), I got to spend time with my best friends. I haven’t seen some of these people in months and it was so much fun to reminisce and laugh and enjoy each others’ company. I missed my friends, I missed my teammates, I missed everything about Ithaca.

This brings me to the FOOD. Oh my god the food. I got to eat at my favorite locations and it was magnificent. Never have I been so happy to eat a burger in my entire life (and I get pretty damn happy when I get to eat a burger). This thing had pulled pork AND an onion ring on top while slathered in cheese and BBQ sauce. Holy. Crap. P.S. guys, if you’re every in or around Ithaca, go to the Ithaca Alehouse. It’s amazing. My favorite restaurant. You won’t be disappointed, I promise.

Some of the other things I did? Well, I watched our football team lose (no surprise there), I got emotionally invested in season 4 of Grey’s Anatomy and now I have to watch the series on Netflix thanks to my teammates, and I frolicked across Cornell’s campus. I also went to the famous Dairy Bar–Cornell’s very own dairy where you can buy the most delicious ice cream you’ve ever tasted. I’m serious. This shit can only be sold on Cornell’s campus because it isn’t FDA approved. Why? Because the fat content is so high. But that’s also why it’s so delicious! The weather was a bit damp and chilly, but Ithaca must have known we were coming back and wanted us to feel welcome because, ya know, there are only about 9 nice days there all year.

I didn’t want to leave my friends or my second home, but come Sunday night, I knew it was time. I was upset and yes, I cried in my car on the drive back to Philadelphia. But ya know what? My four years are up and I wouldn’t trade them for anything in the world, but everything must end.

Plus it helps that Cornell is only four hours away and I can visit any time I please. :)

 

IMG_2584

 


Hello? Is anyone out there?

Hi guys. It has been exactly 80 days since my last post. And I’m sorry.

I meant to post, I really did! Things just got really tough with drama (see this post) and school and such. And THEN I had finals, so I figured… after finals right? Right?? Well finals week has been done for about a week and a half now and I am only just now gaining the mental strength to start writing again. The only way I can explain it is that I guess my brain needed some downtime. This semester blew. (Despite the terrible semester, I did managed to check a few items off my bucket list and 161 things! Yay!)

Endless exams rained down on me and I never thought I would be able to ride out the storm. But I did! Now I only have one semester left of college. One. Semester. WHAT. I’m not okay with this. On the bright side, I’ll be able to get away from all of the drama–the drama that was so elusive my first three years as an undergrad but managed to sink its talons deep into my flesh this semester, making up for all of the missed three years in the process. Again, another story for another time.

With 2014 right around the corner, though, I’d like to think that I kept my New Year’s resolution pretty well. I wanted to write more, and I did. Seventy three posts before this one, actually. I’m impressed with myself. Here’s to 73 more next year!

Anyway, I hope that everyone had a wonderful and safe holiday! There will be many more posts to come!

2014


Overheard on the Hill: Ke$ha and… just Ke$ha

My Overheard post is coming to you on Tuesday because… Ke$ha. Ke$ha came to Cornell and performed on Sunday, and let’s just say that the concert did me dirty. Yesterday was an all around struggle to get to campus. To walk. To breathe. To live. But was it worth it? Helllll yes. I had so much fun. Except now it’s two days later and I’m still finding glitter on me…

kesha

“I was watching TV with my landlady’s 16 year old daughter…”

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“They were canoodling in Wegman’s.”

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“My brain hurts.”

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“I just got elbowed in the dome.”

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“I’m roofie-ing you with popcorn.”

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“I want to shove my nostrils through my eyes and puke them out of my lungs.”

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“He’s a freshman. He’s a loser.”

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“You smell pukey.”

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“You’re gonna instagram the shit outta this.”

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“Cows be cray.”

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“It looks like flowers and dirt.”

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“It’s like negative butt.”

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“I accepted all of your kisses.”

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“I have amazing nipples.”

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“If you were a superhero, I’d call you Catwoman. Hssssss.”

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“You don’t fight in a toga.”

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“After you, Mr. Tinted Windows.”

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“She would talk to a brick wall.”

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“Cheers to salsa.”

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“I can feel the alcohol sloshing around in my stomach.”

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“I might look like a hooker but I like it.”

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“Look, I’m making a Ke$ha angel.”

 


161 Things #8: Streak Across the Arts Quad

Happy Fourth of July! Okay, it’s no longer the fourth but it’s close enough. Every day should be Independence Day, right? And what better way to celebrate than with copious amounts of alcohol. Drinking for ‘MERICA.

#baddecisionswednesday

#baddecisionswednesday

My Independence Day shenanigans got underway on Wednesday night when my roommate and I were pressed for time and decided it was a good a idea to line up a bunch of shot glasses and rip four shots back to back to back to back and then leave. I have never gotten so drunk so quickly before in my life. Once my roommate (who for the sake of this article I will call Annie) and I reached our friends’ house, our bad decisions were quickly met with another one–let’s take America shots! YES! What a great idea!

Let me back up a second though to explain something. From the first Wednesday night I’ve spend in Ithaca this summer, my friends and I have deemed Wednesdays to be “Bad Decisions Wednesdays” (or #baddecisionswednesdays if you will). So let’s just say that Wednesdays are usually an interesting night up here on the hill.

Grenadine + Blue Curacao + Vodka = one patriotic shot

Grenadine + Blue Curacao + Vodka = one patriotic shot

But I digress. So we’re taking shots and playing Kings and basically just ringing in the Fourth of July in a good old American manner. Finally we decide it’s a good idea to leave my friends air conditioned room (which is never a good idea. Air conditioning is like the laughter of Jesus) and go to our favorite local dive bar in Collegetown, Dunbar’s. This bar has been around for decades–no really, I was talking to someone during reunion weekend who loved going there in the 80s–and proof of that is from the walls covered in written names and quotes that are dated with graduation years. Oh, and the jukebox music. That thing hasn’t been updated since I’ve come to Cornell. Wait…what? I just turned 21 and wouldn’t know what Dunbar’s was like my freshman year? …uh, duh, you’re right. Yikes.

I”m going to spare you the details, for both yours and Annie’s sakes, but, basically, what had potential to be an amazing night ended in a bust and the end kinda sucked. I’m standing there with Annie, thinking “I want to do something crazy,” and when I say thinking I mean that I was drunk and I actually said it, only for her to look at me like I was crazy. But then I said, “Let’s streak across the Arts Quad! 161 Things, right??” to which she immediately agreed and we started trekking all the way to the clocktower.

On the way there, Annie starts to get nervous. Especially when two pretty intoxicated people are walking up Ho Plaza (yes, it is actually called Ho Plaza) to get to the Arts Quad only to pass two Cornell policemen writing tickets to a group of students. Actually though, I think that was the reason we were able to get away with it–the cops were distracted so we could shed our skivvies and streak across the quad in what was quite possible one of the most freeing experiences ever. So we dropped our drawers, took off our shoes, picked them up, and sprinted across the quad to Goldwin Smith Hall, the only building on campus open 24 hours.

After fits on fits on fits of laughter finally subsided (oh, and after we put our clothes back on), we headed home, not a cop in sight, with yet another of the 161 things checked off.


Let’s Get Slopey

This shit gets pretty crazy...#CU

Here you go, the promised post about Slope Day. “What is Slope Day?” you ask. At Cornell, it’s the sloppiest, drunkest, shit-showiest, and best day of the year.

Every year, on the last day of classes, Cornell is host to the biggest party and concert of the year–Slope Day. On Slope Day, the Cornell Concert Commission gets some big, popular artist to headline the concert. This year, it’s Kendrick Lamar (ya bish). Ask me how happy I am about this…. AKA NOT HAPPY AT ALL. NO ONE LIKES KENDRICK LAMAR. HE ONLY HAS ONE SINGLE. He doesn’t have  nearly enough music to headline a concert. Fuck that.

“What is ‘the slope?'” you would ask. Well, it’s the biggest fucking hill at Cornell. It leads from Central Campus, where class is held, to West Campus, where some of the upper classmen live. It’s steep as hell, but it’s an excellent concert venue.

On the bright side, Hoodie Allen is also coming to Slope Day… I’M SO EXCITED FOR HIM. I love love loveeee Hoodie. I’m not a fan of rap, but I actually love his music. I’m surprised. Still trying to tweet at him incessantly to get him to come to the softball pregame… we’ll see how that works out.

sd_09_01_0344_09_083Anyway, SLOPE DAY. Basically, people start drinking at about 8am and continue to drink all day (or at least until you get on the slope) and it’s the biggest shit-show you’ll ever see. This is my first real Slope Day (and only, because we’re going to kick ass at softball this year), as a junior, because in past years the softball team has been in the Ivy Championship game and couldn’t drink. Last year I got to go to the slope, but not enjoy it as a real person… I was sober and it was kinda weird.  Drunk bitches errrwhere. But our season kinda went to shit this year, so we get to participate. I’m excited and sad/mad at the same time. Does that make sense?

Slope Day is sure to be quite the experience, and hopefully it’ll be the only time I get to experience it as an undergrad (I will DEFINITELY come back as an alum). Either way I’m pumped for my first Slope Day… just  pray that my team and I survive!!

PS I was entirely drunk while writing this post (sorry Mom)! Starting Slope Day off on the right foot! #college #slopeweekend


Overheard: Spring Break Edition

After a brief hiatus, I bring you the best quotes from Spring Break ’13. The past week certainly was an interesting one, as you’ll see soon. I don’t think I’ve ever laughed harder. Just a warning: prepare yourself for outrageousness.

“I always look sexual.”

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“On a scale of 1 to drunk, how drunk are they right now?”

“Drunk to the nth power, where n is greater than or equal to 23.”

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“Ohhhh the bus is gonna get a haircut!”

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On the airplane, “I need to close the window, the light is assaulting my face.”

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About flying, “It’s safer than stairs. It’s safer than dogs and toilets.”

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My uncle at dinner, “That was outstanding.”

My 4-year-old cousin looks right at me and says, “He says that all the time.”

Thanks Spider-Man! I knew I could count on you!

Thanks Spider-Man! I knew I could count on you!

***

My cousin on the team we had just lost to, “If I was Spider-Man I would take that red team, pick them up and throw them down til they’re dead!”

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Me, “Dakota, how old do you think I am?”

Dakota, “Sixteen!”

“No, a little older.”

“Seventeen?”

“Nope, older.”

“Seventy hundred?”

“Not that old!”

“Sixty six?”

“Jeez Dakota! I’m 20!”

“Oh. That’s old.”

***

“We’re all on the same boat and it’s sinking.”

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“Ohhhh that is juicy.”

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“She showed me her curveball grip and I was like OH YEAH.”

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“I should air out my soul. It’s black and moldy.”

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“I was meant to be a small Chinese child. It’s true.”

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“I was just petting your eyebrows.”

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“If you got stung by a jellyfish, who would you pick to pee on you?”

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“She specializes in starch…”

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“My hair defies gravity.”

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“Fun sucker. What’d you have for lunch? Fun?”

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“You know there’s nothing in the bible about not eating meat on Fridays? They didn’t have meat back then. Just fishes and loaves.”

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“I can’t believe they’re selling beer at a college softball game.”

“It’s okay, that’s what Jesus would want.”

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“You can’t just take pictures of random babies!”

Hmm, never thought of it that way.

Hmm, never thought of it that way.

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“Raptors are so mean because they can’t jerk off.”

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“Who’s got my arms??”

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“Tequila. That got me married.”

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“I wanna take the wind out of their kite. Then snip the string and trounce on them.”

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“I just freaked out about the mole on my arm but don’t worry guys, it’s not cancerous. It’s just chocolate from my milkshake.”

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“Your hand has a four-foot radius.”

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“Sometimes dumb people are funny and sometimes I wanna kick them in the teeth.”

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“There’s no cure for the common birthday.”

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“There’s some imbalance in your brain that you should address.”

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“No traveling in beer pong.”

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“I hope you don’t have your good panties on case they’re about to drop.”

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“Straight isn’t straight anymore. Too much rum.”

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“This is so cool. But I’m so scared.”

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“My nipples are so sensitive right now.”

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“PS my nipple is still there.”

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“Get out of my asshole.”


Overheard on the Hill, Part 6

I know, I know… it’s been a while since I’ve posted. I’m sorry! I’ve had a ton going on between prelims and packing and just plain old homework. I’m not pleased with myself.  This week will be better, I promise!

Despite my lack of blogging, I have managed to compose quite the interesting list of things that I have overheard on campus. They gave me a few laughs and helped me to get through my stressful week. I hope you enjoy them as much as I did!

My friend on the types of men she likes, “I like kosher hot dogs and Italian sausage.”

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“Can I send a picture to your mom of my face?”

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Ugh, I would love to punch him in the face if I got the chance.

Ugh, I would love to punch him in the face if I got the chance.

“If someone asks you if you want to punch Justin Beiber in the face, the answer is yes.”

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“What is this? Rain? Snow? I can’t tell.”

“Me either. It’s Ithacating.”

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“Sometimes I forget to breathe.”

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On dry season, “They just pick a date and then BAM. No more cocaine, I can’t do heroine anymore…”

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“I thought all of my bras were dirty but then I thought, NOT MY PARTY BRAS! Look, it’s bedazzled!”

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“Can we music?”

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“I think you need to calm down the Amish spirit with that skirt.”

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Restaurant patron to a teammate, “Do you guys play field hockey?”

My teammate, “No, softball.”

Patron, “Indoor softball?”

^^^I still don’t believe this could have actually happened. What the hell?? Indoor softball, really?!

***

After eating something really hot, “Woooo, hotsie totsie!”

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“I’m a sausage girl but I can appreciate your bacon-ness”

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“Sometimes I just want to punch myself in the face.”


Overheard on the Hill, Part 5

This week was a particularly interesting–our season is getting ready to start and my team has been particularly… antsy. Excited. PSYCHED. Which leads to some interesting banter between us. Not all of these are from my team, but they’re all good quotes.

“You don’t want to bark up this tree.”

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“What if everyone who’s schizophrenic is really being followed and no one believes them?”

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“I know you can snow down and sideways, Ithaca, but snowing up? Now you’re just showing off!”

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“You know, Alanis Morissette? Angry Canadian?”

The best ribs I've ever had! Sorry, Mom.

The best ribs I’ve ever had! Sorry, Mom.

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On Dinosaur BBQ, “That was dinorgasmic.”

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“They should have made your spine like an accordian.”

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“It’s like being hazed by the weather, because it’s so awful.”

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“I’ve never been so horny in a public place.”

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Frat guy at a party: “What if I walked behind you?”

Girl: “You’d have a good view.”

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“It was such a bad night. But then I ordered D.P. Dough and got the fuck over it.”

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“Alright, so who’s riding interior bitch?” (What does this even mean??)

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“Tinder me and let me know!”

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We’re playing our first games this weekend, so that should be the perfect opportunity to overhear some clutch quotes. Just Wait.


Overheard on the Hill, Part 4

So, this seems to have become a regular Monday thing… it’s Monday, I’m bored in class, so I post all of the absurd things I’ve heard throughout the week. I kind of like it. I’ll keep it up. Provided I still do a good job at recording these quotes on the notepad on my phone. Quotes from this week range from my friends 21st birthday to fraternity formals to random things my teammates have said.

“Why are your nipples so hard?”

“BECAUSE I’M SO EXCITED!”

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My friend on taking a picture with the guy singing I Will Wait by Mumford & Sons during karaoke, “I don’t want to interrupt his musical spirit.”

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laughing-seagulls“Friends don’t let friends like birds.”

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“APPLIANCES. That’s what I look for. Shiny appliances.”

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“I think I’m getting a cold sore.”

“I had one on my tongue but then I bit it off.”

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“Drink more, care less.”

This is my roommate’s new philosophy–I’d have to say that I agree.

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Wine >>> Chicken Parm

Wine >>> Chicken Parm

“Is there any chance you could bring us two bottles of wine and charge it as a chicken parm?”

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Our waitress at formal (By the way, THE BEST WAITRESS EVER) on being asked to bring a Sprite so my friend could drink from his flask, “Plug your nose and chase with water, you pussy.”

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On a fraternity wall, “In life, take it fucking easy but take it fucking hard.”

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My coach to us at Sunday practice, “Get a drink. No whiskey, just water.”

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Cornell, my friends, is a strange, STRANGE place. Or maybe it’s just me.