Overheard on the Hill, Part 10

I don’t know what it is, but I got A LOT of quotes for this week. Maybe it’s spring fever since it’s finally warming up in this hell hole that is Ithaca, or maybe the stress from Cornell is sending people over the edge. Either way, it sure is interesting.

Side note: I realize I have been awful at posting. BUT. It’s because I’m in season and have a ton of work. For the next month, I won’t be posting as much, but there will DEFINITELY be overheard posts. Those are my favorite! Bear with me, puhlease.

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“I’m 98% sure that my nipple is bleeding.”

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“I took my toothbrush for a walk.”

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“Wieners feel so weird.”

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“All I wanna do is get really drunk. And maybe a little bit of drugs.”

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“I waited til I was in love for my first time. But I’m also in love with a tree branch I saw in a forest.”

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Yikes.

Yikes.

“I paid 70 dollars to look like Barbie’s reject.”

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“I’m just convinced I’m the funniest person alive.”

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“The big JC decided I had too much game so he threw me a curveball.”

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About Easter mass last year, “Don’t vomit, don’t vomit, don’t vomit. Amen.”

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“Where am I gonna find three clowns who wanna get drunk with us in Ithaca?”

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“You just never know if people are gonna be normal people or cupcake people.”

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“Get the fuck outta my face, I’m from Jersey!”

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“Is it me or does she look wide as fuck from back here?”

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“If you ever try to shove a baby back in me…”

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“Someone punch me in the eye. I want a black eye.”

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“I think it’s a very nice looking toe, just the proportions are off.”

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“What I would give for three gallons of Mike & Ikes right now.”

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“That shit was majestic.”

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“I’m 99% sure I just sharted.”

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“You know you love each other when you slam each other’s head in a door.”

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“I promised I would never ever do it again after I got caught the first time.”

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The Sandlot: my favorite baseball movie.

The Sandlot: my favorite baseball movie.

“I feel like Benny “The Jet” Rodriguez and all I wanna do is sprint and outrun a dog.”

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“We spent the entire day eating hummus and playing guitar.”

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“It’s okay, when I was 15 the right time was in my grandma’s minivan.”

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About strep, “I only get it from penises, not from mouthes.”

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“But they’re gay and my room’s a mess so they’re probably judging me.”

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“Anything that tastes this good has to take four months off your life.”

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“It’s so hard to go slow down hill. I feel like I’m wasting my inertia.”

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7 Comments on “Overheard on the Hill, Part 10”

  1. The Cutter says:

    Hopefully you weren’t standing too close to the “sharting” guy.

  2. Austin says:

    This stuff is great. You need to record your friends saying all this silliness and post it on You Tube!


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